Sit up Straight

Our body language speaks a lot about ourselves. It is directly related to our confidence levels and state of mind at any given time. Good body language affects confidence and vice versa. Today we will discuss the advantages of sitting up straight. Yes, just sitting up straight in your chair can do wonders not just for your posture but also to your confidence levels. Try it now. Just straighten your back. There you are. Is it making you feel better?

It has been observed that when people sit up straight in their chairs, they tend to believe in themselves and their thought process. People who sit up straight during an interview are more likely to ‘believe’ that they are qualified for a job. Try this little experiment. Write down some positive things about yourself with your back straight and also while slouching over your desk. Does it make any difference? You are more likely to accept and believe in those positive attributes if your back is straight.

When others look at us, sitting straight, they make a positive impression about us; but the best part is that when our back is straight even we feel good about ourselves. Isn’t that a great ‘pick me up’ tool? Any time you start doubting your capabilities, just straighten your back. Nothing could be simpler than that! Your posture will convince you that you are good at whatever you are doing in that moment. Remember your thoughts are affected by your posture, even though you may not realize it at that time. So if you want to become a positive thinker, you have to pay attention to your posture.

Another great tip of the day is to nod your head up and down, as in a ‘yes’, when you are doing some serious study/thinking/contemplation. This gesture makes you confident about your thought process as opposed to the gesture of shaking your head from side to side, as in a ‘no’. Just this insignificant gesture sends some powerful signals to your subconscious mind. You can employ this piece of information to better equip yourself to handle your life. You can try nodding your head while listening to a lecture or presentation; I promise that you will end up assimilating more than you otherwise would have done. So it is a good tool to use in classroom learning!

It is easy to train yourself to sit up straight and nod your head up and down; you can try doing it imperceptibly (the head nodding), so that it doesn’t look too odd; or you can do it intermittently, especially when engrossed in some mental activity. These small changes to your physical posture will offer you great psychological benefits. Try these two tricks while answering multiple answer questions! Your first ‘choice’ will invariably be right!! In any case, you will always do better in an exam if you are sitting up straight!!

Try and maintain a straight posture all the time, soon it will become a habit, and you won’t have to think about doing it. Decide for yourself, would you rather be confident, sitting up straight with your chest pushed out or would you prefer to remain under confident, slouched over your desk, your face looking at your knees? The choice is entirely yours!!!

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Hard Work vs. Smart Work

These days you hear a lot of talk about working smart. People often tell you, ‘You don’t get any where by sheer hard work. Look at the people working at the construction sites, or the ones breaking stones at the roadside. They are working very hard but are they getting anywhere in their lives? If you want to achieve success you need to work ‘smart’.” Such comments leave most of us in confusion. What happened to sayings like, ‘The harder you work, the luckier you get.’ What has happened to the earlier prescription for success, ‘Work hard and success will be yours.’ Is it important to work hard or not? Is hard work a pre-eminent qualification for success or not?

I believe it is. Of course you have to be ‘smart’ about working hard, but hard work always pays. Just being smart or working smart is only half of the real story. The fact remains that hard work and smart work must go hand in hand for you to be successful. Smart work is about making the right strategy. It is about following a disciplined work culture. But finally work gets produced by working hard on that strategy and by implementing those plans on ground. Hard works translates your vision and ideas into results. Look at any successful man today; you will find that besides being smart in their heads, they all work very very hard indeed.

Working hard and working smart go well together. They are not exclusive of each other. Smart work teaches you to be more productive with your time. If you are happy with your current level of success then smart work will surely allow you the luxury of not having to work as hard as you would otherwise do. But if you want to reach the pinnacle of success in your chosen field, than just smart work won’t really help.

Many people think that hard work goes largely unnoticed. They believe that unless you are ‘smart’ about letting others know that you are working hard, you remain a drudge. They call hard work a kind of drudgery. They are more interested in letting the ‘boss’ know that they are working hard. Their focus lies in the wrong direction. They waste a lot of their time and energy in doing this. I think that hard work always gets noticed. Perhaps not in the short run, but eventually people can’t help but notice hard work. No one in this world is blind enough not to notice a hard working guy. And the rewards follow without you having to push for them. Rewards come your way naturally when you have confidence in yourself and your work!

You need to stop worrying about doing ‘hard work’ or ‘smart work’; you should just concentrate on doing your ‘best’ everyday. You should strive for excellence in all that you do. Thinking about rewards and results saps your energy. It creates a ‘neediness’ in you. This neediness is a negative energy; it repels people and rewards from coming your way. Rewards come to you when you are not looking for them continuously. When you strive to learn new things, work at them, grow in your work by improving yourself everyday, how can results be anything but great? When you step out to work with a passion to do your best, you will bring out the best in others as well! That itself is a great reward!!

The most important thing is to focus upon excellence. Success is a byproduct of ex
cellence. When you try to look for your reward in a job well done, other rewards will come your way. Remember that the best always strive to get better! For that you need to push yourself beyond your comfort zone. You need to constantly innovate and improve. You need to work hard as well as smart!!

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Tap the Power of your Subconsious Mind

Most of us rely only on our ‘conscious’ mind for achieving success, while the vast resources of our ‘subconscious’ mind remain untapped. The truth is that the conscious mind is just the tip of the iceberg, while the subconscious mind is the entire ‘iceberg’ itself. By neglecting to tap into our subconscious mind’s powers we end up using only 10% of our real caliber. How can we undo this mistake and make full use of our subconscious mind?

The most important factor in working with your subconscious mind is your attitude. You can tap into this vast resource of information and creativity only with an attitude of calm and confident expectation. Yes, you have to confidently expect the subconscious mind to work for you. After that you have to accept and believe that everything that happens to you, takes you progressively towards achieving success. Are you ready to be calm, confident, expectant, and accepting?

Here is the plan for you to follow:
1. Know what you truly want: Most of us think that we know what we want, but when we are asked to write it all down, we usually flounder.
2. Write down your one goal in great detail: Until you write your goal on a piece of paper, it remains just wishful thinking. Once you put it down on a paper, it becomes a clear signal to your subconscious mind that you actually want to achieve that goal.
3. Reframe your goal in simple, present tense: Re-write your goal in simple, present tense (for example: I am successful. I am confident. I have cleared CAT. I earn 40,000/- per month. Etc) on a small card. Read and re-read it as often as you can, so that it gets steeped into your subconscious.
4. Make a list of all the steps that you are ready to take to move towards your goal: Making such a list helps make you believe in the possibility of achieving your goal. It intensifies your desire.
5. Prioritize this list: Re-do this list putting the most important step on top of the list and the least important step at the bottom of the list.
6. Everyday take action on one of the items on your list: Taking some concrete step everyday helps you maintain momentum towards your goal.
7. Visualize your goal as often as you can: See the outcome of your goal as a foregone conclusion in your mind’s eye. Feel as though you have already achieved your goal. Form a clear and vivid picture. The clearer your picture is the faster it will come into your life.
8. Feel the happiness and excitement: Create a heightened emotion of happiness, satisfaction, achievement, and excitement just the way you will feel if you had actually achieved your goal.
9. Behave as though your success is a reality: Have complete faith in your subconscious mind’s ability to bring your goal into reality. Be confident that you are moving towards your goal.
10. Release your goal: This is the most important step in this process. Once you have taken all the 9 steps (in about 9 days), you must just release your goal to the power of the universe. Yes, just let it go. Release all attachment to it. Just trust that you will be guided to take the right actions at the right time. Get out of the way of the working of the universe/your subconscious mind.

Try this technique on one small goal today. When you achieve that goal, your faith will strengthen. Then you can try it on other more important goals. Don’t take my word for it. Use your life as your laboratory. Soon you will graduate from a ‘positive thinker’ to a ‘co-creator’ of your destiny! Are you ready for this ride?

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Discipline your Self

Gary Ryan Blair, a motivational speaker, once said, “Self-discipline is an act of cultivation. It requires you to connect today's actions to tomorrow's results. There's a season for sowing, and a season for reaping. Self-discipline helps you know which is which.”

Just like motivation, discipline cannot really be enforced from outside. It is an intrinsic quality which is very important to be cultivated in order to achieve success. We need to be self disciplined if we wish to achieve our dreams. Most people do not like the word ‘self discipline’ as they think that it restricts their freedom to do, say or think what they want to do, say or think. People tell me that they try very hard to be self-disciplined but tend to fall into old patterns because of habit. This predicament tells me that these people have not understood the true meaning of self discipline. So what does self discipline really mean? Is it about creating rigid structures/ time tables and following them religiously? To me self discipline is an intrinsic attribute that defines who we really are. It does not amount to ‘doing’ something. It is all about ‘being’ something.

The first most important step in being self-disciplined is setting a goal. To most of us goal setting means specific objectives that need to be met and smart actions that need to be taken, in a given time frame. A goal is generally supposed to be tangible and material. It is something which the intellect can comprehend as ‘success’. Of course, such goals are important; but our primary goal should always be that of attaining self discipline. Once that goal is achieved, the rest would fall in place automatically. Unless you are self disciplined your smart goals will remain unachieved. In the process, they will end up causing so much stress in your life that they will do more harm than good.

So, how can you become self disciplined? Self discipline encompasses self respect, self worth, and self responsibility. It is an amalgamation of all three. It is a shift from dependence upon others to dependence upon self. When you want to achieve success that brings money and a sense of personal satisfaction with it; it is a form of aspiration, a goal of ‘doing and having’. The goal of ‘being’ self disciplined requires introspection. This goal is ‘intrinsic’ and not driven by any external trappings. If you want to impress someone with your self-discipline, then the goal has been set by that person not you. Do you get that? Self discipline is a goal for you, by you, and about you. Its focal point must lie within you.

How will you know that you have become self disciplined? The following are the qualities of a self-disciplined person. Check them out and grade yourself:

· A self-disciplined person respects him/her self.
· A self- disciplined person takes responsibility for ‘all’ that s/he experiences in life.
· A self-disciplined person does not dissipate her/his energies by dabbling in un-productive activities.
· A self-disciplined person remains focused on the task at hand and channels all her/his energies in the right direction.
· A self-disciplined person knows exactly what s/he desires from life.
· A self-disciplined person sets high standards for her/himself.
· A self-disciplined person is open to new learning.
· A self-disciplined person produces high quality work (quality of your work is a direct reflection of how much respect you have for yourself).
· A self-disciplined person works for self development and not to impress or belittle others.
· A self-disciplined person feels worthy of all that s/he achieves.
· A self-disciplined person doesn’t play the ‘blame game’.
· A self-disciplined person doesn’t wallow in ‘victim mentality’.

Are you there or do you require some more ‘self-discipline’? Think about it and take action asap!!

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Achieve your Highest Potential

How many of you think that you have achieved your highest potential? I am sure there are none. After all success is a journey and at any time we have the potential to achieve more than we currently have. But how many of us actually understand this fact? More often than not we reach a plateau and stop thinking about achieving more. In order to achieve our highest potential in each stage of our lives, we need to understand ourselves. A few questions help us do just that. Take some time and answer the following questions.

What is important to you?
What do you live for?
What have you always wanted to do?
What stops you from achieving more than you have?

Answering these questions would set you on an amazing journey of self-discovery and stupendous growth. Are you ready for it? Are you aware of the activities that make your heart sing? The trick lies in indulging in these activities more often and with more enthusiasm. Be totally involved in these activities. When we are involved in something that we feel passionate about, we automatically give our all to it. We are able to devote all our energies to the task at hand. In the process of enjoying ourselves, we lend more power to the end result of these activities. Ask yourself; do you want lukewarm results or powerful results? The choice is entirely yours.

Sometimes we get too bogged down by the mundane things that just have to be done. It is easy to slip into half-hearted efforts of drudgery and most of the times we do just that. Have you ever thought what may happen if you start paying more attention to your routine tasks? To begin with, start focusing more on the benefits of the work that you do, rather than on the work itself. Create a sense of inner pride about everything that you undertake. For example, don’t do your job because you have to. Do your work as though it is the most important job in the world.

Why must you do that? Why should your attitude matter in such a simple, routine thing as your work? The fact remains that if you approach your work with grudging obligation, a few things will happen.

You won’t enjoy the process. You will be more focused on just getting it done. You won’t give your full attention to the process.
Since you didn’t pay full attention to the process, the results will not be satisfactory. The results may be ‘okay’, and you might be fine with it, but won’t ‘good’ be better than ‘okay’? And won’t ‘great’ be better than ‘good’?
You will miss out on a great sense of accomplishment that comes from a job well done.

If you wish to experience a greater sense of joy and fulfillment in your life, enjoy the things that you do, and expect the very best from life. Settling for anything less is insulting your highest potential!!!!!!!

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Transform your Consciousness to Succeed in Life

Have you ever wondered how a failure-consciousness is created and what you can do to move out of it? Most of the times we remain failure conscious, because of our over-entanglement in the material world! Everything reminds us of our inability to ‘afford’ it. This idea of perpetual lack makes us conscious of the fact that perhaps we are failures in this world!! These thoughts also release stress chemicals into our brain, making us feel fearful of future. The more we fall into this trap of ‘not enough of successes’; the more we start thinking negatively. These thoughts create mini panic attacks in our consciousness; eventually we end up becoming a failure in whatsoever we undertake. These ‘loser’ thoughts in our body-mind deplete our energy, creating ‘failure-attacks’ in our inner world, which eventually manifest in our outer world!

Do you really want to remain entrapped in this cyclical experience? Surely not! This experience makes you certain of one thing, which translates as ‘I do not want any more of this experience.’ So, what is it that you ‘do’ want? If you just focus your awareness away from failure to success; your problem can be solved.

Buddha said, ‘We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make our world.’ Do these statements ring true for you? Suppose you were to put all your attention on feelings of acceptance and gratitude for all your successes, big or small, where will that take you? Some chemicals will be released in your brain that will make you feel positive, and you will feel this positivity throughout your body. If you do this regularly, more of these ‘feel good’ chemicals will be produced, making you happier by the day. This inner vibration of happiness will attract ‘success’ towards you in all its myriad forms, such as admission in a good college, a higher paying job, great relationships etc.

Learn to measure your success only upon the quality and quantity of ‘feel good’ feelings you are experiencing. Success is a relative word. Besides, it is not a destination; it is only a journey. It is a continuous process. It is impermanent. You are only as successful as your present assignment. Right now, you measure your success upon clearing CAT, J-MET, or XAT etc. Then your success will be measured upon getting a call from some good institute; then upon converting that call into a seat; then doing well in your course and bagging a good placement; after that it will be measured upon your climb up the corporate ladder. Someone has rightly called it a rat-race. Even if you were winning this race, you are still a rat; and you have to keep running as long as the other rats are running. When does this ever end?

Well, it ends the day you start measuring your success upon the quality and quantity of your ‘feel-good’ feelings! The true permanent state of success can only come from within.

Appreciating each success on your path and being grateful for it is the fastest route to getting there. There are many successful people on this planet, who do not ‘feel’ successful and are continuously striving to achieve more. Even though they have all the trappings of success, they actually remain entrapped in ‘failure-consciousness’. Do you get my point?

Being grateful for your daily successes is the easiest way to end failures forever. When your success is measured by how deeply you feel successful and how often you visit this feeling, your success experience becomes a permanent feature in your psyche.

Now that you have understood the secret to being successful; pay attention to your current beliefs regarding success and failure. More often than not our hidden beliefs run our lives from behind the scenes. If you think that you need to work ‘harder’ in order to be successful, then that is exactly what you will create in your life!

Go deep within you. Examine your beliefs. What beliefs are lurking there that make you struggle more, work harder, remain stressful, and feel like a failure all the time? These beliefs are creating your reality. You can change these beliefs anytime that you want to, and choose empowering success beliefs. Remember that your mind is creative. Use its powers to create success in your life. Explore every aspect of your being; understand yourself. This understanding facilitates your growth and evolution. Life is not a problem to overcome, but rather something to enjoy! Appreciate, love, respect, and accept life.

The golden rule of life is that whatever you put your attention upon expands in your life. So focus upon your successes and do not dwell upon your so-called failures. Doing so will uplift your vibrations and your mood. You will open up to more success in your experience. The ‘success’ that you are missing is actually hidden behind your ‘failure consciousness’. Your focus on failure is making ‘true’ success elude you.

Be willing and open to trying out this new understanding. You have the power to transform your failure consciousness into a success consciousness. Consider your failures as your teachers, and learn from each experience. Go ahead; make a list of all your failures, no matter what they are. Go through them one by one. Let go of the feeling of how you had wished the outcome to actually be. What did each experience teach you? Make a list of all these learnings. See how your life has been enriched by all these learnings.

Now make a list of all your successes, however small they feel to you. How do you feel thinking about them? Appreciate yourself for these successes. Enjoy the feeling of achievement. Spend sometime re-living those successful moments. Remember, whatever you focus upon grows in your life! Think thoughts such as, ‘Thank you God for my successes.’ ‘I am successful.’ ‘I have it in me.’ ‘I can do it and I will do it.’ ‘I can count on myself.’ These thoughts will make you feel confident about success.

Think successful thoughts, and EXPECT success!!

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Develop your Social Skills

Developing social skills is as important as developing professional skills if we want to become well rounded individuals. These skills not only help us in our personal sphere but also play a great role in our work/study space. In fact possessing these skills is an important pre-requisite for developing self confidence.
Generally the social skills difficulties become apparent during adolescence. The same child who had happily played along with other kids suddenly starts feeling isolated. S/he can’t seem to strike friendships any more. This happens because of the changed social interaction requirements of teenagers. As a kid, all s/he had to do was take turn at certain games; but as one grows up, one needs to take into consideration a lot more than that.
As an adolescent and an adult you need to be able to grasp both verbal and non-verbal cues. You need to distinguish between literal and non-literal language. While most of us manage to make this transition, it doesn’t come easily to some of us. The worst part is that the world around us takes these skills for granted. We are just supposed to know all this as we grow up. This pressure makes some of us to give up trying and become introverts.
These introverts want to make friends and have an active social life, but they don’t know how to go about it. They fear being ridiculed or worse still, ignored. They are the ones who most often get bullied; at home, school, college and work. They are labeled as ‘weirdo’. Unfortunately when we are labeled as such, we tend to live up to these labels. Labeling people is the worst thing we can do to them.
Parents, teachers and peers just wonder, ‘why doesn’t this guy just get it?’ No one realizes that such people are suffering. Unless they are helped, the consequences can be devastating. Socially recluse people suffer from anxiety, depression, substance abuse and social isolation.
If you are one such person who feels socially isolated, you could try the following
Smile more often. Try smiling at everyone you meet.
Learn to offer help wherever needed.
Become genuinely interested in people.
Learn to actually listen to what others are saying, and ask one or two questions that show that you have been listening.
Instead of asking, ‘what is in it for me?’ Ask, ‘what can I do for you?
Look at your strengths, instead of looking at your shortcomings.
Appreciate yourself and appreciate people. Yes, you will have to say it out loud and be genuine about it. You can easily find one good thing to appreciate in everyone you meet, including yourself.
Last but not the least, love and respect yourself for what you are.

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How to motivate yourself?

Everyone knows that motivation generates success, but most of us look at factors outside of ourselves to motivate us. Can others motivate us? The answer is unequivocally ‘NO’. Others can create conditions to motivate us but that’s all they can do. Motivation always comes from within. What if we could truly be our own motivators! Would you like to learn this art of motivating yourself?
We often talk about motivation, we discuss motivation, we read about it, and we learn motivation theories. We do get motivated as well, but this motivation doesn’t last for long. What can we do to stay motivated all the time? Different people get motivated by different things. What motivates you may not be the same that motivates your friend. Some get motivated by positive thoughts, while for some others enjoyment is a motivating factor. Some get motivated if they are made to feel important while some others get motivated by success. To some people personal benefit is a motivating factor while to some others clarity of purpose is motivating. What is it that motivates you? Think about it. Perhaps it is a combination of many factors.
Here are some things that you can do to motivate yourself:-
· Whenever you attain any goal, however small, advertise your success to all and sundry. Thank everyone who has played any role in this success. Talk positively about yourself and all your endeavors. Also compliment others on their success.
· Write down all the things that you enjoy doing. Whenever possible do the tasks that you enjoy. Build enjoyable activities around your primary goal in life. Celebrate when you succeed, by treating your friends to coffee or lunch. Smile more often. Your enjoyment is contagious. Show happiness when others succeed.
· Listen to people but form your own opinion about everything. Take credit for your ideas while giving credit to others for their ideas.
· Set clear, reasonable goals for yourself. Understand what these goals mean to you and your life.
· Identify how you can gain from any activity that you undertake. State this gain clearly to yourself. Monitor your success. Evaluate your level of success. If you do not succeed, question yourself, ‘Why’, so that you would know what to do next time in order to succeed.
· Plan your activities and your communications. Be clear about what you write and what you say. Be clear in both: your thoughts and your speech.
Once you are truly motivated, no one will need to prod you or nag you. You will enthusiastically carry out all your tasks. Ultimately you will learn more and grow faster. But be careful not to force your own motivational preferences on others. Remember, each one of us has our own motivational hot spots!!

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Become an Effective Communicator

Effective communication skills are a valued commodity in today’s world; more so in these recessionary times. How can one hone these communication/speaking/ presentation skills?

Thorough preparation of your topic/subject is of utmost importance. You must be very clear as to what you wish to convey and why? Once you know the purpose of your message, you can easily focus upon organizing your thoughts. Ask yourself, “What is the message I wish to convey?”
Being completely relaxed while speaking/presenting your ideas adds value to your views.
Rehearsing before presenting is helpful, whether you rehearse physically or mentally. More prepared you are more relaxed you’ll feel.
Visualization techniques or mental imagery helps you determine the kind of results you want to achieve. You can visualize an event either with closed eyes or with open eyes. Bring in positive and joyful feelings into your visualizations.
Your appearance adds substance to your words, so your clothes must be chosen with care. When you know that you look good, you feel confident. However, you should look smart but not flashy. It is best to wear something that you feel comfortable in.
Any materials or visual aids you plan to use must be prepared well in time.
Don’t rush to the venue at the last minute. It helps your composure to be there well ahead of time.
There are times when you have to speak impromptu; in that case quickly organize your thoughts and get clear about the purpose of your speaking. Tell yourself, what you have to say matters.
Choose to speak about topics that you believe in. Convey messages that you resonate with. When you speak about something with passion and conviction, people listen to you.
Act confident. Think of a time in the past when you were very confident. Just thinking about it will bring that energy back to you and you will feel empowered. Remember, confidence is contagious.
Do not be self-conscious. It is best not to pay attention to yourself while speaking. Remove your focus from yourself and put it on your message.
Cut out all negative self-talk. If you think that others are sizing you up and checking you out; immediately put a stop to such thoughts.
Allow the natural you to express yourself and shine through. Do not ‘try’ to gain approval by putting up a show.
Breathe in a natural and relaxed manner. Before speaking, pay attention to your breathing. If you are tense your breathing will be shallow.
Speak in a conversational manner. Look at the audience eye to eye. Talk to individuals in a group and not to the group as a whole.
Tell yourself that it is alright to commit mistakes. Mistakes are only a part of the learning process. Everyone makes a mistake once in a while.
The idea is to do your best and give your all but be willing to accept yourself exactly the way you are. You don’t have to be perfect.
Express yourself completely with your entire being. Let your enthusiasm show. Don’t hold back. Stay in the flow. This will ensure your peak performance.
Stay in the present moment; the here and now. Don’t think of past or future. Don’t think of the outcome.

All these tips will help you perform at your peak level. Go ahead, and speak with confidence.

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Planning your study hours in a hostel

“Do not squander time for that is the stuff life is made of”. Benjamin Franklin said this and he was right; but say this to any hosteller (especially a new hosteller), and they would wrinkle their pretty nose at you. Hostel life can be great fun once we get adjusted to it; and from there on having ‘fun’ becomes a priority in life. No, no one is asking you not to have fun, but please for heaven’s sake do not forget your primary reason for being in that hostel. Yes, if I may remind you, it is to ‘study’. In fact most parents prefer putting their wards in hostels because it reduces travelling time and increases ‘study’ time. These well meaning parents forget that most hostels are not the most conducive places for study. There are many distractions and unless one is disciplined and self-regulated, managing time may be a tad difficult for most youngsters.
However, not all youngsters are alike. If you are conscious of your life goals and mature enough to take responsibility of your life; then certainly you will remain focused, otherwise you need some support from outside (parents, friends, counselors etc). Here are some pointers from my book of life:-
· Determine how you spend a typical week by keeping a record of all your activities. This will include time spent in classes, studying, sleeping, exercising, grooming, eating, relaxing, and socializing. Analyze this chart and review it.
· Work out your priorities. Each aspect of your daily routine is important but some aspects are more important than others.
· The quality of your study time is more important than the quantity. So create your study plan. Decide what to study, when to study, and how to study.
· Write down your objective for studying.
· Set your targets. Be protective of your study time from unwarranted intrusion. Manage your time effectively.
· Decide upon the subjects and topics you will cover during each study session. Include variety to stay interested in your studies.
· Analyze your strengths and your weaknesses with honesty. Pay more attention to the areas that you are strong in. This advice may defy common wisdom, but I believe in working on your strengths to strengthen yourself. This will improve your effectiveness.
· Review your previous study session at the start of a new session. This will keep you connected with your work and build up from there.
· As you progress with your course, evaluate how you are achieving your personal goals. Perhaps it is time to re-structure your study hours. A good time to do this evaluation is during mid-semester.
Remember that studying at regular intervals through the year offers the best chance at success. Your study area, your capacities, and your ambition will finally determine your personal study plan. If you can proudly say, ‘I plan my work and then I work my plan’, you have found the perfect formula for success!!

HT Horizons

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How to hold your own in Group Discussions?

Doing well in group discussions has become an important criterion for getting into a college/institute of your choice. In order to perform this feat one has to be clear about the purpose of holding a group discussion. Which qualities in a candidate make him stand above others? Which magic factor decides who is in and who is out?

In a group discussion, there are candidates of the same age group, possessing similar intelligence levels (as ensured by the cut off marks or written tests), discussing an issue informally. A group is generally made up of six to ten candidates, who have full freedom to discuss their views in the manner they please. This exercise enables the examiners to assess the personality traits of many candidates within the same time frame.

The candidates must understand that as opposed to a written exam which is an elimination test, a group discussion is part of the selection process. It means that from any one group of candidates, all, some or none may be chosen. It also means that you need not try to be one up on the others in your own group. Instead, you need to cultivate some winsome qualities and project them on the D-day. This way you will carry your team along with you.

What are these winsome qualities? Educational institutes are looking for intelligent, confident, visionary leaders who have tremendous communication skills, listening skills and inter-personal skills. A GD offers a great opportunity for natural leadership qualities of a candidate to emerge. How can you make sure that you come across as a leader with a vision? Here are some points worth looking at:

· A common misconception amongst candidates is that you must speak as much as you can and as many times. Yes, you must speak, but not all at the same time, as happens most often. Everyone trying to speak at the same time creates more mayhem but no winners.

· An important point is to learn to disagree agreeably. Remaining polite in the face of provocation is a great quality.

· Losing your cool and getting emotional about any topic is a strict no-no.

· Speaking fluently and convincingly is an art that you must inculcate.

· Knowledge of a subject is a great asset. You cannot possibly speak on a subject unless you know it thoroughly.

· Talk intimately yet audibly. Do not shout or mumble. Pronounce your words clearly.

· Approach the topic objectively and rationally. Offer authentic and convincing reasons in support of your arguments and conclusions.

· Create a strong and favorable impact upon your group.

The key to holding your own in a group discussion lies in displaying initiative, intelligence, patience, tolerance, tact, and faculty of speech. A GD is not about being competitive; it is about being assertively co-operative!!

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How to beat nervousness before an interview..

Most of us talk dime a dozen when we are with our friends, but the moment we are asked to face an interview or participate in a debate, we get tongue tied. We start fidgeting, sweating, and looking around; rather than focusing on the topic being discussed. Why is it so? What makes us so nervous? Is it the fear of failure alone or is their something else at play? Whatever be the reason, it is more important to know how to overcome this situation. How can we beat nervousness before an important event? Here are some suggestions:-

· Before you start an interview, you would be required to shake the interviewer’s hand. Make sure to wipe the sweat off your hands prior to entering the interview room. A sweaty handshake is not the best way to start an interview.

· Do not start asking too many questions at the beginning of the interview. Speaking too much is a sure sign of nervousness. Just sit there as directed and let the interviewer handle the interview. Give straight, intelligent answers. Save your questions and comments for the latter part of the interview.

· Look into the interviewer’s eyes in order to stay focused. If you feel uncomfortable doing that, just look at one point near their eyes. In any case do not look around the room or at the ceiling, as if looking for something. Doing this is a sign of either nervousness or disinterest. Both these traits won’t get you anywhere.

· Sit up straight with your back against the chair. A slouching posture or sitting at the edge of your chair not only makes you look unintelligent; it also shows your lack of pride in yourself. Do not move or fidget in your chair. It shows that you are uncomfortable being there.

· Don’t smirk or laugh that nervous laughter when faced with a question that you can’t answer. It will surely give away your uncertainty. Employ a serious, business-like expression and answer the questions honestly.

· Take a small pause before you answer. Don’t start answering immediately. Don’t try to keep repeating your answer or give explanations. That shows lack of self-confidence.

· Do not scratch your head, rub your hands together, crack your knuckles, jiggle a foot, bite nails, tap your fingers, touch your face un-necessarily, adjust your tie, clench your fists, rub your nose, or twirl the ring on your finger. All these movements give away your nervousness and insecurity.

· Your tone of voice easily reflects your nervousness, so speak deliberately and clearly. Remember, it isn’t only what you say, but the way you say it that makes the real difference.

One vital thing to remember is that everyone, without exception, feels slightly nervous before an interview. The success embraces those guys who know how to beat this nervousness…….

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Social Intelligence

We have heard of emotional intelligence, but social intelligence is the new ‘must have’ doing the rounds these days. During the economic slowdown, this expression has taken a new meaning. Developing social intelligence is said to improve most areas of your life. It is being termed as a life changing skill. But what does social intelligence mean? Before we understand that, tell me which are the areas that count in your life? Easy enough! For most of you, these would be your career, your wealth, your relationships, your happiness, and you, yourself. Let me tell you that a high social intelligence will help you improve upon all these areas.

As of now how would you rate your social intelligence? Have you ever walked confidently into a room full of people and initiated an engaging conversation with someone. How successful are you in striking a conversation with someone of the opposite sex, and making that person look at you with admiration? How often have you got what you wanted; such as a job, a raise, a business deal? What about your family? How often do you get them to do something happily and willingly? To sum up, do you have a verbal advantage?

Has there been a time, when you have been completely engrossed in a conversation with someone? I am sure you can remember many such times. Imagine yourself in one such scenario. You are talking and someone is intently listening to you. You are completely into that moment. You are feeling great rapport with your listener; paying all your attention to this person in front of you. You feel completely connected. You intuitively feel that this person understands you. When s/he speaks you too hang on to every spoken word. There is instant understanding. This type of friendship and respect goes beyond words. I think you have got the picture.

Now tell me how much better your life would become, if you feel the same kind of rapport with everyone you meet? Got you there! You will invariably say, ‘it is impossible to develop this kind of rapport with everyone.’ This is where your social intelligence comes in. Have you ever wondered how some people become millionaires even without going to college? Well, I am not talking about the ones who inherit millions or who use illegal means to earn their money. I am talking about regular people with a highly developed social intelligence. This skill makes them charismatic. They win hearts wherever they go. Let us see what other benefits can be reaped by this single skill.

When you have oodles of social intelligence, you end up getting preferential treatment: during travel, at work, in social setups, or even in malls!! You easily develop instant rapport with people. Total strangers respond warmly to you. People control their attitudes and emotions when they are with you. Your family and friends respond warmly to you. You feel emotionally fulfilled. Even when you need to correct a colleague, friend, or family member; you can do it easily without causing any heart burns. You deal efficiently with difficult and angry people. You get noticed. You stand out in a crowd. You become successful. You gain respect.

You must be wondering how is all this possible? Well, all this and much more is possible, if you develop social intelligence. Now you will ask, ‘What do I need to do in order to develop social intelligence?’ Developing social intelligence is not tough, all it requires is your intention and sincere practice of some time tested tools. Let me just enumerate the important steps to you. As you become good at it, you can add your own steps.

• To begin with you will need to become genuinely interested in people.
• You will need to learn to actually listen to what others are saying, and ask one or two questions that show that you have been listening.
• You will need to come out of your self-centeredness.
• Instead of asking, ‘what is in it for me?’ You will need to ask, ‘what can I do for you?’
• You will need to love and respect people for what they are and not for what they have or what they do.
• You will need to look at people’s strengths, instead of looking at their shortcomings.
• You will need to appreciate people. Yes, you will have to say it out loud and be genuine about it. I am sure you can find one good thing to appreciate in everyone you meet.
• You will need to smile more often. Try smiling at everyone you meet.
• You will need to offer help wherever needed.
• Last but not the least, you will need to love and respect yourself.

These steps if followed regularly to a ‘T’ can help you achieve personal and professional growth. Social intelligence is a life changing skill. It can also be termed as ‘soulcializing’. All great communicators have worked at this skill.

You see, this is an advanced form of effective communication. Every time you communicate with someone, what do you try to do? Most of the times you are persuading someone to do something or avoid something; whether in the present or in the future! Every time you face two choices. Either you do it outright or you convey your message in subtle ways. In order to succeed you need to be effective in both these methods. Your social intelligence helps you choose the right method at the right time.

Of course, you do need to have your other credentials in place. Social intelligence is just the icing on the cake. But you well know that it is the icing that makes the difference. Have you seen sprinters running in a competition? The champions are invariably just a few hundredth of a second faster than the rest. Similarly, most successful people have mastered just a small skill here and there, which is unknown to the rest. They often use right charm and words to get other people to open up to them.

So, determine what you want to achieve in life, hone your social intelligence skills, and EXPECT success!!!!!

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Seven Steps to Success

Have you discovered the most powerful success technique on Earth as yet? Are you ready to take some steps that could change your life? Do you wish to enjoy success along with limitless energy? Are you interested in experiencing creative rushes? Do you want to think like a genius and solve problems quickly? Do you wish to double your ability to learn and release all stress in the process? All this may sound like some sales pitch to you. No, I am not selling anything. I am just asking you to follow some steps that I have been following with great satisfaction. It won’t cost you anything but a little attitudinal shift.

Someone rightly said that when life hands you lemons, make lemonade. So, in these uncertain times of worry and financial concerns, it makes sense to use all available tools to rise above any situation that life may have handed you. Let us look at these tools now.

Don’t make your heart ‘set’ upon something: - When you set your heart upon achieving something, you are opening yourself to a probable upset. On the other hand, if you stay ‘open’, you release the desire to control those things over which you have no control whatsoever. Then you just concentrate on doing your best and letting go of the result. Isn’t this what Lord Krishna propagated in Gita? It is time to revisit this timeless wisdom. As you release your fixed expectations from yourself, you can breathe a sigh of relief. ‘Unknown’ is a great territory. Once we ready ourselves to explore it, we discover some powerful aspects of ourselves that we didn’t know existed. Yes, we are more powerful than we give ourselves credit for. When you push through your fears, you are ready to explore and use this incredible power that is available to you.

Stop ‘hoping’, start ‘wondering’: -Watch your words. How often do you use the words, ‘I hope’. If you are like most people, these words form a regular part of your vocabulary. Now, whenever you want to say, ‘I hope’, replace the words with ‘I wonder’. Instead of saying, ‘I hope I clear the CAT’, say, ‘I wonder if I will clear the CAT.’ Speak these two sentences out aloud; verbalize them. Feel the difference in their energy vibrations. The second sentence is definitely more positive. While uttering the first sentence, you are part of the drama, but when you vocalize the second sentence, you have detached yourself from the outcome. (Gita, anyone?) It is like watching a good play and wondering what comes next. Hopes have a chance of getting dashed but wonder is another ballgame. It opens up new possibility of growing and learning, whatever the outcome may be.

Trust: - Once you realize that you do not have much control over what happens in your external circumstances, you are left with just two choices. You can think of yourself as a poor little thing, a victim at the mercy of outer events or you can choose to develop trust in your innate capabilities. You can choose to think that come what may, you will take the best from all situations; trusting yourself and the Universe. One easy way to develop trust in life is by deliberately shutting off negativity in any form. If you repeat the mantra, ‘Whatever happens in my life, I can handle it’ as often as you can; you will eventually believe in it. And if you really believe in your own capability to handle everything in your life, nothing can deter you from your path. In future, whenever you are bogged down by any ‘what ifs’, go ahead and chant this mantra. You will feel powerful, confident, and peaceful.

Role models: - Do you have any role models? People who have achieved success against all odds? Look for such heroes in your environment or your history books, and then tell yourself, ‘If they could do it, why can’t I?’ Yes, if others can learn and grow from their experiences, so can you. You can learn and find strength from anything that you do in your life. The trick lies in seeing all situations in life as a means of learning and growing. Once you release your need to experience things in a certain way, you can learn from any thing that happens to you. All situations carry inherent learning opportunities. Just embrace the situation and find the gift.

Affirm: - Affirmations play a great part in our growth process. One of my all time favorite affirmation is, ‘Everything is perfect the way it is.’ You see, the fact is that at any given time we cannot see the larger picture; the ‘grand design’. The whole picture is a mystery until it is revealed to us, and that happens only in retrospect. We look at our past and exclaim, thank God this did or didn’t happen at that time! When we affirm that it is all happening perfectly, we begin looking for ‘good’ in every life situation. And the truth is that whatever we look for, we find it. Sometimes we can find a great deal of good in a most hopeless situation.

Focus on success: - While going through the rigmarole of our daily existence, there is a lot that we take for granted. From now onwards please start taking note of your little successes. In my workshops, I ask all participants to make a ‘win list’ at night. This win list includes all the things that you know you are going to do the next day. Simple things such as getting up, wearing slippers, going to the bathroom, brushing your teeth, bathing etc, are part of a win list. All you need to do is that after performing each task on your list you just tick it. It is something like a ‘to do’ list but unlike the ‘to do’ list, ‘win list’ contains all those chores that you are certain of doing, so there is no scope for failure. It may sound like a simple tool, but it is very powerful. With each ‘tick’ your brain registers a ‘win’. It gets used to appreciating your successes. By noticing these small successes, life becomes successful. Remember, being successful is a habit.

Take positive actions: - As we get involved and take positive action, we re-affirm our faith in ourselves. Ask yourself, ‘What must I do now?’ Make a list of all that comes to mind. Do not censor anything. And then immediately begin to take action. At the end of it you will feel powerful and successful.

So, live these secrets to creating a fulfilled life and EXPECT success!!
Advanc’edge MBA, April 2009.

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Healing from Insecurity and Stress

What is it that makes us feel secure in life? Educational credentials, well paying job, decent bank balance, comfortable home, or happy understanding family?? What is your pick? People have a tendency to cling to all kinds of goals and aspirations in order to feel secure. Some cling to career goals (when I do an MBA, I will feel secure), some have financial goals (when I earn 20 Lakhs per annum, I will feel secure), while some harbor relationship goals (when I get married, I will be secure). In these uncertain times, it makes sense to ask ourselves, what are we clinging to, in order to feel secure? Many a times we achieve our career goal only to find that our relationships are in a mess. Or we achieve our relationship goal and find our finances going all awry.

The other day a friend of mine asked me, “What do most people want?” The answer just came, “A little bit more.” Yes, this is the punch line. Most of us are never satisfied or secure. ‘A little bit more’ eggs us on. But the fact is that true security cannot be found in the outer world. This global recession is here to teach us this universal truth. It is time for us to find security in the present moment, in the here and now, even though everything seems to be going wrong in our lives. Most of us see ads like ‘the complete man’. We see pictures of young, good looking, successful people and feel, ‘this person has everything’. Yes, there are a few lucky people who achieve all their goals or so it seems. But the truth is that these achievements still fail to make them feel secure. Security cannot be found by fixing everything in our life from the outside. It is an inside job.

What does this insecurity do to us? To say the least, it produces stress in our lives. An excess of stress blunts our sensitivity to the very process of living. In the present times, stress is affecting every level of our society. It is resulting in us changing our friends, our jobs, and our life partners more often than ever before. Now thanks to global recession, we are being asked to adapt to an insecure world. How do we do that?

We need to listen to our inner guidance in the middle of a chaotic and insecure world. This will help create inner peace and tranquility. Detach yourself from your pre-occupation with jobs, families, and friends as attachment causes you to imagine all sorts of fearful and negative outcomes. Live in the present moment. Remain committed and involved with your work and your families but realize that you are not dependant on them for your security. Instead become more dependent on your inner guidance. When you develop faith in your intuition and depend upon it to guide you, you will be led to a peaceful foundation in a turbulent world. Living intuitively will help you unfold your wings.

Fear of this new world order makes us more stressful. It fills our minds with all kinds of negative thoughts. We start worrying about how to earn enough money. We start doubting our capabilities. We start conjuring up images of catastrophes. We imagine that something terrible might happen. These worries produce more stress. The excess stress impairs our performance and our judgments. Letting go of our worries and entering an unknown future makes the transition much easier. Learning to completely trust the inner calling takes us to just the right place for us. When we take the risk of letting go of our past conditioning, we discover freedom. We escape the worry trap.

When we start taking our first few steps into the unknown, it may seem very frightening, but our persistence assures us that our inner guidance can be trusted. This assurance makes us relax. We become comfortable and choose new directions with inner confidence.

Sharing our thoughts with close friends and family members helps, but we need to completely take responsibility for our lives. We must let our intuition guide us in becoming a participant in making important decisions that affect our lives. How do we connect with our intuition? There are many ways, but I will share the one that works for me.

Sit in silence at a regular time every day. Closing the eyes helps in the process. Ask your higher self for guidance and then ‘listen’ to the answer. Do not filter anything; listen to all that comes to your mind. After opening your eyes, make an entry in your personal development diary (if you do not have one, please make it NOW). Thank your higher self for the insights and ask this part of yourself to help make the inner changes in you. Over a period of time you will not only develop a sense of peace and security, but also receive guidance for taking actions. These inspired actions will lead you to your life’s path.

Listening to inner guidance will help simplify your life. Dada Vaswani of Pune tells this lovely story. In a handloom factory, each worker was told, “If your threads get entangled, call for the foreman.” One day a new worker’s threads got entangled. She tried to disentangle them, but only made them worse. Finally she asked for the foreman. He took one look at the threads and said, “Have you been trying to do this yourself?” She nodded her head in affirmative. He said, “Why didn’t you ask for me?” She timidly replied, “But I was doing my best.” The foreman quietly said, “No, you were not. In future remember that doing your best is sending for me.”

This is exactly what we do in our own lives. While we think that we are doing our best, we complicate our lives. Now the time has come to call for our inner guidance, and that is the best thing we can do. We can be healed of our insecurities and stress by following our potential. It may lead us to a different life path from the one we are used to but it will definitely take care of all the complications that have entered our lives without our being aware of them.

So go ahead, turn to your inner guidance, relax and EXPECT the very best from life!!!!

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Role of Confusion in our Lives

I am confused. What is the confusion you may ask and my answer would be, ‘Aren’t you confused?’ These are confusing times indeed. Confusion is in the air. It is contagious. What makes us all so confused? We, the people, who have lived most of our lives with clear, analytical approach on every subject under the sun! We, who work out various permutations and combinations and predict the trends in every area of our lives! It is not about us and our capabilities anymore. It is the ‘times’ that are changing. No, longer are we able to predict anything with any certainty and that is what is causing this great epidemic of confusion. We are zapped out of our wits.

The weather, the economics, the politics, or the job scenario; nothing is as it used to be. There are job freezes, de-hirings, salary cuts, bonus freezes, cost cuttings and resultant insecurities. Most institutes are seeing poor placements. Even the so called ‘premier’ institutes can’t ensure plum placements. The bubble seems to be bursting. One thing follows another and the Domino effect gathers momentum.

So what do we do in these uncertain times? What are the choices that we have? The solution seems simple enough to me. We just need to understand the confusion and find the silver lining hidden in it. If you have read the Chaos theory, you would know that confusion can be very deceptive. Out of confusion great creativeness takes birth; which brings about clarity.

What is this clarity we are looking for? It is the clarity to move forward and take the next step. They say a lot of clarity results after churning the sea of confusion. So let us churn this sea and find out for ourselves.

We must start from the premise that confusion is a platform from which we can have greater access to wisdom. Confusion hampers our habitual way of thinking, which is a blessing in disguise since our habitual thoughts tend to block our wisdom. When these habitual thoughts stop working, a new door opens for us. It is like when our brain can’t figure something out, it goes nuts!!! We have been programmed to think that our brain must figure everything out. After all that is its’ job; to understand things. When brain stops doing its job, we kind of stall. If we stay in the flow and stop fighting or resisting this ‘stall’, we can easily transition from brain based intellectual logic to deeper soul wisdom.

Wisdom is an advanced and elevated thought form. It arises from a place where there is no active thinking, a place where mind stops its habitual function. In fact, there is no mind anymore. Have you heard of meditation? Do you meditate? For those of you who are used to meditating, this place would be familiar. In this place you do not think; you just let the thoughts come and go like ever drifting clouds on the vast blue sky. In this non-thinking place you connect with the wisdom within.

Does all this sound a bit spooky to you? You are not alone in this. From the time we have started understanding things we have been told that thinking is a master skill. In the Seventeenth century Rene Descretes so profoundly proclaimed, ‘I think, therefore I am.’ We never questioned this proclamation. We resonated with it. Now is the time to question it, because as I mentioned earlier, the times are changing now.

The time has also come to question the very basis of our education. The word ‘education’ is derived from the Latin word ‘educere’. It means to draw out or bring forth. What does our education system do? Does it draw out wisdom from the students? No, instead it tries to fill the students up with information. I do not wish to start a debate on this subject so let us leave it for now. Let us simply accept that we have worshipped ‘thinking’ for far too long.

I am not condemning thinking per se. It certainly has its place. But is it the only tool we have? It is like a tailor using only a pair of scissors, or a carpenter using only a hammer. Where will it get them? They will be able to do some tasks but all their abilities won’t be put to use. The same thing applies to thinking. We have many other faculties besides thoughts. Let us put them to use now.

Actually the fact is that we do use these faculties ‘unthinkingly’. When we day dream, we often tap a deep wisdom by default. Similarly in the moments of confusion wisdom surfaces to reveal an answer or an insight! No amount of thinking could have brought this up. Have you ever experienced a time when you couldn’t remember something even after thinking hard about it? And then suddenly many hours later when you weren’t even thinking about it the memory came back to you in a flash. How does this happen?

Learning how to ‘not- think’ takes some time and practice. It is the same with any unused skill. Non-thought is a feeling as opposed to a word or words. Let me give you an example. A beautiful scene such as a sunrise or a sunset or any other object of beauty often takes your breath away. Take notice, invariably in that moment you are in ‘non-thought’, as though the beauty has also taken your words away.

Yes, breath and thoughts are deeply connected. Try holding your breath for a while. Observe your thoughts while you are holding your breath. Are you surprised to note that you can’t think while you hold your breath?

So, if you wish to derive benefit from this confusion, learn to practice the art of non-thought. Break your addiction to words. Notice your feeling of confusion and instead of struggling to find an answer to this confusion just accept it. Let it be. Don’t analyze it. Be confident that in this fog of confusion lies the path to a deeper ‘knowing’. Expect this ‘knowing’ to help you choose your individual path. Feel the freedom of not knowing and dissecting everything to pieces.

Breathe and feel………..don’t think. During these challenging times your habitual thinking will kill your inner wisdom. Welcome confusion and uncertainty. Let go of your little restrictive view of life.

Discover the truth beyond the circumstances and EXPECT success!

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3 P's of Success: Passion, Perseverance, Patience

Do you know that the earth continuously spins at the rate of 700 to 1,038 miles per hour? That’s quite some spin!! Do you feel this spin? Are you sure you don’t feel it? Just as the earth spins on its axis and we, the people living on earth, don’t feel it, similarly the results of passion, perseverance, and patience are not always felt, at least not immediately.

Through this column, I keep encouraging you to dream, visualize, persevere, and carry on regardless of apparent realities. But the secret to success lies in carrying on, with your own convictions. We may not see the results as we work, but if we remain at it, it is bound to show up. In fact, higher we want to reach on the ladder of success, harder the process will seem. At times it can be very frustrating. Many people give up, before the results become visible. Are you one of those people? I don’t think so. You know how this system works. Don’t you?

Have you ever planted a tree, I mean a sapling? A sapling eventually grows into a tree when you water it regularly, and take care of its other needs. Can you see it growing everyday? I don’t think so. What happens when you don’t water it for a few days? Well, it just dies. Do you get the point? You need to have passion, perseverance, and patience, even for growing a tree; what to talk of ‘growing’ a grown up human being!

Yes, it is natural to feel deflated if you have not cleared any entrance exams, or if you didn’t get an interview call, or worse of all if you couldn’t convert your call into a seat. The way to combat this feeling is to put all your niggling self doubts to rest. Yes, you can do it. Give all your focus and energy to your renewed commitments. Keep re-visiting your original promise to yourself. What was your inspiration to begin with? Remember it now. That passion to invest in yourself will keep you moving forward. Your passion to do well is real. Trust it. Trust yourself. Trust the universe.

If you do that, and keep watering your sapling, you will see that the sapling will form a solid root system (the foundation of your success), soon the branches will form (your support network), and flowers will blossom. Very soon you will enjoy the fruit of this tree: your tree! Yes, the fruit of success does take its own sweet time. So eliminate ‘failure consciousness’, embrace ‘success consciousness’ and get going.

Have you ever wondered what creates ‘failure consciousness’ in the first place? Would you like to know how to step out of it? At times it so happens that we become overly entangled in our ambitions. We get wrapped up in the feeling that we do not have enough (enough money, enough job opportunities, enough growth avenues etc). This thought of ‘lack’ or ‘not enough’ sends stress chemicals to the brain. These chemicals bring about the programmed response of ‘fight or flight’.

The fight response makes you stay on but it puts unnecessary pressure on you; while the flight response makes you give up. Both of these responses don’t really help. So what is the way out? The simplest way out is to eliminate the trigger for these responses. How would you do that? You would do that by changing your thought process.
Negative thoughts deplete your energy. You already know about it. So refocus your attention upon appreciation of all your strengths and a clear evaluation of all the opportunities in your life.

It is very apt to remember what Buddha had said 2,500 years ago, ‘We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make our world.’ This saying holds good even today, in our fast paced competitive world.

With perseverance, you will soon start feeling successful. In any case, the real measure of success does not lie in outward trappings of our world. Your real success lies in the quality and quantity of ‘success feelings’ you experience. If you remain connected to your inner core, which gives birth to your passion and makes you feel good about yourself, there is no reason to feel low. There are many people out there in this wide world, who have all that you dream of, but they do not feel ‘successful’. Patience is the track that will take you towards magnetizing success to you.

Now that you know this secret, be consistent in your efforts. Question your beliefs about success. We all have hidden beliefs that run the show behind the scenes. Say if you have a deep belief that you must work harder in order to be truly successful, then that is exactly what will become your reality.

Go deep inside. Look at your old paradigms. What is it that makes you struggle more, work harder (not smarter), get stressed, and still be less successful? What can you change in your thoughts that will bring about a paradigm shift in your life? What new empowering beliefs can you cultivate?

To begin with, start relaxing more often. Appreciate all that you have in your life. Go and have that special experience, you have always denied yourself. Enjoy your wonderful body and your creative mind (these have been freely given to you). As you learn to feel good about yourself, you will notice that each day of your life will unfold itself in successful ways.

Your outer world is a place where you discover who you are. Your successes or your failures are an exquisite reflection of what is going on ‘within’ you right now. Remember, what you focus upon grows in your life. So keep your focus upon positive thoughts of success, and watch things change in your life.

3 P’s of success: passion, perseverance, and patience must remain your constant companions on this growth path. Are you ready to walk this path with a smile on your lips and hope in your heart?

Change your focus and EXPECT success!

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Where is your Focus?

The New Year has dawned; heralding a new beginning? But where is your focus? Are you celebrating the change or feeling worried and anxious about your future? I have been interacting with many youngsters and there are mixed responses. Some are feeling a kind of release from undue pressures to perform, while some are feeling more pressurized wondering about their social and personal future? Some are wondering if there is any point in pursuing a management program if there are no jobs even after attaining an MBA degree. Which side are you on? Please remember, now more than ever, ‘whatever you focus upon grows in your lives.’

Let us try and put all the recession related anxiety and resultant woes into proper perspective.

I have nothing against media. In fact it plays a major role in our lives. But it also tends to bring an overdose of negativity into our lives. Listening to some doomsday stories, even the most courageous amongst us becomes fearful of future. So may I request you to minimize your news viewing to the bare essentials? In stead read stories of entrepreneurs who didn’t go looking for a job, or chucked their high paying jobs in order to follow their heart. Perhaps it is your time to do that. An MBA degree will come handy in equipping you with the right tools for entrepreneurship. Each one of you will not only employ yourselves, but many others. Does recession stand a chance in face of such determined individuals?

Do not react or defend your stand. Take a good look at the reality. Weigh your options and just follow your heart. There are many positive, wonderful, and loving things out there that you can put your focus upon. Now is the time to ask, ‘What can I do for you?’ to your self and all other significant people in your life. Some of what you undertake now may open new avenues for you. You never know! After all you didn’t even know about recession just four months ago or did you?

Take into account all the wonderful natural talents and innate gifts that you possess. Don’t say you have none. Each one of us is blessed with our unique talents. This is the time to polish them and encash them. Yes, you can do it! You will not only survive; you will flourish, during the recession and far beyond it. Have faith in your self, now more than ever! Focus on the results that you desire and take appropriate, inspired actions to move forward.

Some of you have more free time now. How are you using it? Are you investing it in upgrading your most precious holding- you, yourself? Are you focusing more on your creative talents? Use this time to cultivate new skills. How about developing your intuition? A very important tool in these times!!! An investment in yourself is the best investment in these times of stock market crashes. Ask yourself, ‘What can I do to develop my natural talents in order to use them to make money, help myself and help others?’ The answer will come. Yes, it will.

Investing in yourself will also reduce your anxiety levels. You will stop talking about good times and bad times. All times are ‘opportunity’ times for you. Just because everyone around you is anxious doesn’t mean you need to follow their example. Reduced anxiety will help you stay focused on your long term goals. Show yourself in a new and different way; soon others will also notice your resolve, strength, and happiness. You can do nothing about the outward panic but you can sure calm the panic inside you. Yes, you can!

This is the time to separate the wheat from the chaff. Keep company with people who harbor positive thoughts and positive outlook. Such people will inspire, encourage and support you. Let the birds of a feather flock together and fly out to achieve their dreams.

Take time each day to enjoy yourself. Remember joy begets joy, while sorrow begets sorrow! Look for small things in your daily routine that can make you happy. Celebrate each little ting and enjoy each step forward. This is a sure shot formula to win over these recessionary times.

This is also the time to put your ego aside and ask for help. This help could be in the form of an advice, support, or suggestion. Welcome all help. Ask for it and receive it.


“One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes. In the long run, we shape our lives and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And, the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility."

--Eleanor Roosevelt

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